Actually, that’s not true. Beowulf isn’t 300 at all. No, that’s not true either. Let’s see…

Beowulf offers interesting visuals and nice one-liners, just like 300. Not to mention abs! The difference is that Beowulf is more cartoonish and less realistic visually, has a stronger story, is less decadent (you know…how 300 had that “naked” priestess dance scene…and how the Persians were portrayed), less nudity (it’s all covered by the gloss of computerization, and there’s really no sex – it’s PG-13 after all), and less memorable one-liners (what can compare to “This is Sparta!”?). Beowulf does call out, “I am Beowulf” quite a bit, though. Oh, yeah, and Beowulf offered less abs than 300 did.

I thought this trailer really made me think of 300:

But, in fact, the movie was much more like this trailer:

The visuals, though they reminded me of Shrek at the beginning, were pretty good. I verily enjoyed the acting. Some parts were scary and literally painful to the ears; that is, Grendel attacks the mead hall at least partly because he can’t stand all the noise they make, and the audio cues us in to what Grendel hears, and his screams are awful on us, too.

There were some (intentionally?) funny moments in the movie, as when Beowulf bursts out of a sea monster’s eye and screams his own name. I think that this was done to reflect Beowulf the character’s own nature – during that scene, HE’S telling the story, and of course he has to add all these fancy, heroic trimmings to it – after all, he wants to be sung about for ages to come.

I have yet to read the actual Beowulf story, though my brother says the movie differs significantly from the original. Still, I enjoyed the massacre Grendel commits at the beginning; I thought it sufficiently traumatizing and bloody. Grendel’s design was horrifying… As for his mother…well, I thought the CG took something away from the puffiness of her lips, and her head sat strangely on her neck… I liked her voice, though, and that strange dialect (?) she used with her son.

If I used a rating system, I’d give this movie an A-. A – because…oh, I don’t know, I think that if I saw it again I wouldn’t be as happy with it, and the A because it’s freakin’ awesome and fun, even though the movie is mostly serious. There are some good-natured moments, though, and sometimes my brother and I couldn’t help but laugh at things. Definitely a movie to go see with (guy) friends.

Update 1/13/08: I was replaying the second Beowulf trailer and I realized that the music is “In a Heartbeat” from 28 Days Later. Awesome.